So that’s where they’re all hanging out…
Coming soon! “Rattlesnake and Hepatitis Nail Salon”, or, possibly, “Rattlesnake and Hantavirus Petting Zoo”.
Bonus Joke: Two snakes are sunning themselves on a rock when one turns to the other and asks, “I forget, are we poisonous?” The second snake replies, “Out of curiosity, why do you ask?” The first snake answers, “Because I just bit my tongue.”
I drove by this sign yesterday and, thinking it hilarious, considered going back to take a picture. However, within two minutes of searching for it online, I discovered that someone already had. Oh, Internet, is there nothing you can’t do?
An Irishman is sitting in a pub when three Englishmen decide to goad him into a fight. The first approaches the Irishman and says, “Did you know that Saint Patrick was a poof?” The Irishman replies, “No, sir, I did not. Thank you for that piece of information,” then returns his attention to his pint. The second Englishman walks over and tries next, saying, “Did you know that Saint Patrick was a transvestite?” Again the Irishman replies that he was not aware of that, then thanks the Englishman for educating him. The third Englishmen decides to remove all doubt by saying, “Did you know that Saint Patrick was English?” The Irishman replies, “No, but I think that’s what your friends were trying to tell me.”
I love you, TSG.
My personal favorite has always been “Phil McRevis”.
For those requiring an explanation.
Do you ever get the feeling that you’re being watched?
A tragic story, but I just can’t stop laughing.
And last, but not least, thank you Rob Cardwell for providing us with this excellent demonstration of grace under pressure.
Please be kind.
My mission is now to devise and market a product so preposterous that the inevitable derision and parody turn it into a meme. Then I’ll have two markets:
A loyal member of my legion readership steered me towards this amusing bit of satire from the Huffington Post about Americans’ knowledge of geography:
Poll: 37% of Americans Unable to Locate America on Map of America
For those interested in recent, actual findings on the subject, the 2006 National Geographic-Roper Survey of Geographic Literacy is worthwhile reading.
For those decidedly uninterested in recent, actual findings on the subject, please enjoy the 2007 Miss Teen USA South Carolina YouTube clip for the hundredth time.
I can’t stop laughing. And I suspect Mr. Vonnegut would have been flattered.
BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
From Jay Louis’s Hot Chicks with Douchebags:
His popped-collar, spikey-haired presence was so far beyond regular douche, so far beyond überdouche, he could spontaneously create a new element on the periodic tables – Douche Nine.
Just a friendly reminder to my gentle readers, keep your collars down, and try not to become a meme.
I find this simply hilarious, and it took me back to the Lazlo Letters. Eschewing more traditional forms of payment, Mr. Thorne instead offered to settle a $233.95 utility bill with a drawing of a spider:
Special thanks to Jane for playing it straight.
